The primary requisite of a leader is wisdom, which is first determined by the ability to know the consequences of any given action. and its ramifications over time.
In every situation or decision, there is a –
When did you set it up?
If you can be ruthlessly and very privately honest with your Self, you will be able to determine the timing and path of any event or choice, taking full responsibility for its origin. Ask your Self, when did I set up whatever is happening now.
What was your expected pay-off?
What power did you think it would give you, what was your expected reward?
Who was involved in the pay-back?
The pay-back is in the relationships, who is being affected, negatively and positively.
What was the price?
Finally ask your Self, what is it costing me, what is the price.
Create a habit of examining your leadership choices with these four steps and you will have a unique wisdom. The secret is to keep it to your Self. Ruthless honesty is not a sharable commodity. Sugar coat it or deal with it superficially and you will miss the Self-training opportunity.